Limitless
by k2912p
Summary: Filler for 'Over The Limit'. Lee and Amanda come to terms with the changes in their relationship, both professionally and personally


Filler for "Over The Limit". Takes place between the end of act four and the tag.

Special thanks to Lanie Sullivan for the Beta work and the title and Elizabeth Bowker for lending an ear. You ladies made this a much better story than it would have been!

Francine saw Amanda's disheartened expression after Lee yelled at her. She glanced at Lee, hoping an apology was forthcoming, but instead saw his jaw muscle working overtime. She wondered for what seemed like the millionth time what was going on between the two of them. She wasn't buying his insomnia excuse any more than was anyone else at the Agency. Coupled with Amanda's outburst in Billy's office the day before, it certainly seemed like more than partnership was going on. With a final glance between them, she walked around the gate and took the gun from Amanda. It was only then that she noticed that Amanda was shaking.

"Well, no matter how you did it, you saved our lives. Thank you, Amanda, that was terrific!" She turned and glared at Lee, hoping he would come to his senses and thank her. Unfortunately, he just stood there staring at Amanda, clenching his jaw. She checked her anger and turned back to Amanda. "Listen, how about you head back to the Agency to give your report to Billy while we finish wrapping this up here?"

Amanda smiled at Francine's unexpected compliment. "Sure, Francine. I'll see you there." She turned and left, never looking at Lee. Her resolve was shaky at best and she didn't trust herself to keep her emotions in check, something she was finding it more and more difficult to do where Lee was concerned.

As soon as Amanda was out of earshot, Francine turned to Lee, her friendly demeanor gone. "You're really living up to your code name today."

Their backup had arrived and was working on taking O'Keefe into custody, freeing Lee to focus on their conversation. "What are you talking about?" He walked the length of the fence, meeting her around the other side.

Francine worked on removing the pins from the wig. "Amanda just saved your hide…by firing a gun. A gun! Lee, you told me yourself that she won't even shoot at the virtual range. She fired a REAL gun…to save YOU, and you yelled at her!"

A contrite expression flitted briefly across his face before his agent mask snapped back into place. "What do you care, huh? You've never been her biggest fan."

She narrowed her eyes at him. "She happened to save my life, too! I don't know what's going on with you, Scarecrow, but you better get it together. For all our sakes." She fluffed her hair with her fingers. "I'll see you back at the Agency." She started walking away from him.

"I drove you here!" He hollered at her retreating form.

"I'll find another ride!" She shot back, never turning around.

Lee raked his hand through his hair as if the act alone could brush away his frustration. What was wrong with the women in his life lately? Sure, Amanda had saved their lives, but didn't she realize she could have just as easily been killed? She had no business being there, especially since he had ordered her to go home. He was the senior agent, after all. Of course, Amanda didn't go home. She never waited in the car either. Why would he expect her to do anything he asked of her? But if she went home, you might be dead right now, a little voice reminded him. He had to admit that Amanda had done a great job, but that alone was part of the problem; she relied on instincts, while he relied on training and facts, things that she just didn't have. Her instincts may be good, great even, but one day she was going to find herself in over her head and then where would she be? What if he couldn't get to her in time? Didn't she know how much he worried about her? How much he loved her?

Loved her? Where did that come from? Sure, she was his friend, his best friend even, but love? Did he love Amanda? Sure, he thought about her all the time, but was that love? Sure, he had been having very unprofessional dreams about her four times this week alone, but was that love? Sure, he couldn't live without her… "Oh my gosh." The realization stopped him cold. He was in love…with Amanda. He smiled wryly at the use of Amanda's familiar exclamation. It was the latest of many ways in which she had infiltrated his life and now she had wound her way into his heart. Lee was surprised to find this didn't scare him. In fact, he found himself filled with a peace he hadn't known before.

Meanwhile, Amanda hurried toward her car parked outside the gates of TransOceanic. She was still shaking; she had never behaved so recklessly before. She shuddered when she considered what could have happened had she not been able to stop the bomber. It was easier to take him down than she had thought it would be. She suspected her residual anger over finding Leslie in Lee's apartment had something to do with that. She picked up her pace, her anger once again surfacing. She was so tired of the mixed signals from Lee; holding her close after the bombing one second and yelling at her to go home the next.

"Go home, Amanda. Francine can dress up like you, Amanda! I don't want you, Amanda, I just want your dress!" She had been muttering under her breath, but as her anger escalated so had her voice until the last few words had been shouted. She now found herself being looked at a bit strangely by a couple of Agency employees who were securing the bomber. She smiled awkwardly and waved as she continued by them, catching the scowl sent her way from the bomber.

What were you thinking, Amanda? You could have been killed! She berated herself internally this time, wishing to avoid a repeat of a moment ago. What possessed you to come here, let alone take down a bomber on your own? She had gotten herself out of jams before, but this was the first time she had intentionally put herself in the path of danger. She tried to reason that Lee could have been hurt if she hadn't been there; he wouldn't have seen the bomb. However, she didn't know about the bomb ahead of time. She tried to tell herself she had acted on instinct, knowing O'Keefe needed to be watched. The image of a pair of hazel eyes flooding her mind exposed that lie, causing her to slow her pace while her heart rate increased.

You did it to prove to him that you were more than a housewife with a station wagon and a mortgage. If he couldn't look at you like a woman, you were going to make sure he looked at you like an equal. Her thoughts caused her to wince. She wasn't his equal; she wasn't trained. She wasn't his equal romantically, either. She would have to face facts; she would never win the heart of Lee Stetson. The sense of loss she felt at that moment was overwhelming. She couldn't imagine a life without Lee in it, and she resolved in that moment to keep him in her life in whatever form that took. She had hoped that today she would have at least earned his respect, especially when she fired a gun to protect him. Hell she would have shot O'Keefe if it meant keeping Lee safe. The thought stopped her cold; she knew in that moment she would use deadly force for him. She leaned over an unsuspecting bush and emptied her stomach. She would kill for the man she loved.

TBC…

Lee quietly entered Amanda's backyard and started toward the kitchen window when he heard a small sound. He turned toward the direction of the sound and saw Amanda sitting in the gazebo. His pulse quickened at the sight of her. He thought he had never seen anyone look so beautiful. The wind played with the ends of her hair, tossing it gently about her shoulders. The moonlight danced across her face and gave a silvery tint to tears that were silently sliding down her face as a small sniffle escaped her. His head drooped as he realized he was probably the reason she was crying. With renewed resolve he straightened up and took a step forward.

"Hi," he spoke softly, not wanting to startle her.

She turned away from him and brushed her hand across her face. "What are you doing here, Lee?"

He winced at the coldness of her tone, but stepped towards her. "I wanted to see you."

She turned back to him, but did not meet his eyes with her own. "It's not a good time, Lee." Her voice was laden with sadness, and despite her best efforts she was unable to conceal it from him. She had been sitting out here since her return from the Agency, needing some time to decompress from the events of the last few days. To say Mr. Melrose had been upset when she gave him her report was an understatement. She knew she had violated several procedures with her actions and had told him that she was willing to accept whatever punishment he felt was appropriate. However, since her actions had in all likelihood saved the lives of two agents, he had let her off with a stern warning and a promise that should her actions be repeated, he would have no choice but give her a written reprimand in her file.

Lee sat beside her, relieved when she didn't move away from him. He realized he ached to pull her into his arms and comfort her, but knew the time wasn't right. "Billy pulled me into his office after you left tonight. He, uh, wanted to know what you were doing at TransOceanic with no backup and without telling anyone where you were going."

Amanda sighed. "I explained that to him in my report."

Lee nodded. "I know. I think he wanted to hear from me how I screwed up to make you do that." He grinned at her, hoping to break the ice. When he was met with a stony silence, he continued. "You did take an awfully big risk today. I'm just wondering why you did it." He forced himself to keep the fear and worry that he felt out of his voice, knowing that Amanda would misinterpret it as anger.

"I told you O'Keefe needed to be watched, and I knew there was no way that he was going to believe Francine was me. But you were…" she let her voice trail off, not wanting to restart their argument from earlier.

Lee took a deep breath to keep his temper in check. He turned towards her and took her hands in his. "Amanda, you really could have been hurt…"

She didn't let him complete his thought, her anger flaring once again. She yanked her hands forcefully from his and stood over him. "If I hadn't shown up, you could be dead right now! You and Francine both. She understood that! She thanked me! Did you? Oho, no! You yelled at me that I didn't take O'Keefe out! Lee, I'm not trained. I don't like to hold a gun, let alone shoot one! Yeah, it could have gone wrong, but it didn't. I stopped him! Just like I stopped the guy with the bomb!"

Lee looked at her, confusion etched on his face. "What do you know about the bomb?"

She winced, not realizing that Billy hadn't told him that part of her report. "Oh. I was sort of…there."

Lee jumped to his feet. "You were where, Amanda?"

She couldn't face him, couldn't watch the worry and fear go across his face. She turned and walked to the other side of the gazebo, wrapping her arms around herself. "When I got there, I found a good vantage point behind some crates. I climbed up to look around, and I saw a man come out of the offices. He walked over to the gate and I saw him place a small metal box on the ground. He came behind the crates, too, but he didn't see me, because I was up higher than he was. I saw your car come around the corner, and that's when I saw the black fob in his hand. I knew it was a detonator. I pushed some crates onto him and jumped him. He brushed me off, but I grabbed a piece of wood and hit him with it. He dropped and hit the button, but you were far enough away by that point."

Lee stood there, slack jawed. He couldn't believe what he was hearing; Amanda had subdued a bomber and saved his life again? His stomach lurched at the thought that she could have been hurt, and then again when he thought of how badly he had been treating her. This woman, even in her anger at him, still cared enough to protect him regardless of her own safety.

Lee crossed over to her. Grasping her upper arms lightly, he turned her to him. "I'm sorry, Amanda."

Her gaze was levelled at the ground in the space between them. When she spoke, Lee had to strain to hear the words. "You hurt me, Lee."

His head drooped and he closed his eyes against her words as he tightened his grip on her arms. "I know. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to –"

"I thought…" Her emotions threatened to break free, and she swallowed hard.

"You thought what, Amanda?"

She shook her head. "Nothing. It doesn't matter now."

"I think it does matter."

"No, Lee."

"Please, Amanda. What doesn't matter?"

She turned away from him, hugging her arms to herself again. "I thought – I thought if one day you wanted someone who was normal, that maybe… and I thought lately we were… we had been…" She shook her head sadly, unable to complete her thoughts. "Like I said, it doesn't matter." She waited a moment for him to say something. When the moment passed in silence, she surreptitiously brushed away a lone tear that had made its way down her cheek. She took a deep breath and straightened up before turning back to Lee with her best attempt at a smile. "Look, it's just been a bad day. I'm going to go take a long bath, get some sleep and tomorrow will be a better day. Let's just forget this ever happened, okay?"

Lee still hadn't said anything and was watching Amanda with a pained expression. He searched her eyes for an answer he already knew but was afraid to accept. What he saw was a deep pain and sadness. She took a step to pass him. He knew in that instant he needed to stop her, and he may not get another chance. It was time for action. He reached out and grabbed her arm before she got by him.

Amanda froze at his touch and closed her eyes tightly against the emotion that threatened to burst loose. She attempted to draw a deep breath, but her pounding heart wouldn't allow it. "Lee." She breathed his name, unable to find her voice.

"I told you I'm bad at this. What if I mess it up? I can't lose you, Amanda!" His voice cracked and he tightened his grip on her arm in response. "Um, what I mean is, um, well, hell, you're my best friend, Amanda."

He watched her for what felt to him like hours. He noticed as her posture softened and her arm relaxed under his touch. After an interminable wait, she turned to him, brushing away the fresh tears that had trekked down her cheeks. He braced himself, acutely aware that his future would be decided with her next statement. As her face softened and he was graced with a smile he released the breath he was holding.

"You're my best friend, too, Lee. That's why I took the risk. I knew you were in trouble, that O'Keefe was planning something." She took a breath and continued, "And I can't lose you, either."

The two agents stared at each other; the heaviness of the moment replaced with relieved smiles. After a minute, they moved simultaneously into an embrace.

Subconsciously Lee inhaled her scent, something that always seemed to calm his nerves. "I want to apologize for the way I acted after you saved us from O'Keefe."

Amanda shook her head still resting on his chest. "No, you don't have to apologize, I understand," she said hanging her head. "If I had missed, he would have shot you…shot us."

"Hey," he lifted her chin to look at him. "You saved my life. Again. What I should have said is thank you."

She blushed slightly under his scrutiny. "Oh, you don't have to thank me, Lee."

"Yes, I do. Amanda. What you did was incredibly brave." He shook his head in awe of her. "I'm sorry for how I reacted. I was just…well, you know."

She smiled up at him. "Yeah, I think I do."

He retuned her smile and hugged her close once more before releasing her. "I better let you get back inside. Are you going to be okay?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I'll be fine."

"I was going to see the Sullivans tomorrow morning to give them the good news. I thought maybe you'd like to come along?"

Her smile got even brighter, if that was possible. "I'd like that."

"Can I pick you up? About eight?" His heart rate increased as he waited for her answer.

She gave a slight nod and replied breathily, "Love to."

He smiled softly at her, trying to convey the love he felt for her. "Goodnight, Amanda."

"Goodnight, Lee," she relied with her own love-filled gaze. She watched as he retreated from her back yard. With a happy sigh, she left the gazebo and headed off to bed, feeling much lighter than she had in weeks.


End file.
